THE STINKY VAULT PRESENTS: THE CLOVERFIELD PARADOX

THE CLOVERFIELD PARADOX (2018)

Director: Julius Onah

Rating: 2.7

Welcome to my first entry of the Stinky Vault in Geek for Hire in English. This section is basically about movies that are so funnily bad that they belong to a Stinky Vault, today´s victim is the latest installment on the Cloverfield franchise: The Cloverfield Paradox. Basically the movie's original plot is about a bunch of scientists that screw up with a particle accelerator and suddenly discover that Earth is gone.

Now, that sounds like an interesting premise. What could go wrong? The movie had everything to succeed, a wonderful cast, a succesful producer, two wonderful preceeding entries, and an awesome marketing campaign where the first trailer was released at the same day of the movie's premiere. But a well made marketing campaign does not equal a good movie.

The Cloverfield Paradox is one of the most dissapointing movies of 2018, a boring experience with an exciting premise plagued by clichés and senseless sub plots. For some reason, this reminds me of one of my least favorite films of all time: Dreamcatcher. This movie was frustrating to watch as with that awful Kasdan movie, except that in here we have no aliens crawling up people's asses.

Let's talk about positives, the production, costume design and CGI are pretty good. And that's pretty much it. 

The ensemble cast is pretty good, however I couldn't care less for their underdeveloped characters, the ship's crew tries to be a carbon copy of the first Alien movie. I think when this movie was just God Particle and wasn't related to the Cloverfield franchise, there was a backstory for these characters, however character interactions and development were cut so the studio could give us endless exposition and a bunch of idiotic sub plots that pretend to tie loose ends but end up getting a more confusing experience. I like ambiguity, like Jeremy Jahns said, with ambiguity you can have it two ways, the movie leaves you with questions that you get answered with each viewing or you have plot holes. Believe me, after several viewings, The Cloverfield Paradox is muddled with lots and lots of plot holes.

The attempts at comedy are horrendously bad, there is this guy who gets his arm chopped off and his reaction is definitely the worst I've seen in a movie my whole life, when his arm shows up it doesn't look creepy, it looks like Thing from The Addams Family. There are pivotal situations that occur to our characters that leaves us with a Meh reaction.

This movie is really dissapointing, The Cloverfield Paradox is a muddled film that is just as intring as looking at a sink, let's just hope that Overlord brings the franchise back to its roots, instead of me wating to be eaten by Clover the monster.

This was my entry on the Stinky Vault, next week we'll have more reviews coming along with a special Month this coming March where we'll have a Sci Fi month and also reviews about International Geek Films. If you liked this, you can comment below and share it, this blog isn't just mine, it's yours.